SwissMama's Momaroo

Learning at a record pace

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 05:04:52 GMT

Eek, I have not had much time for momaroo lately. Little D has figured out how to pull himself to standing, which means he's standing up all over the place, but then he sometimes forgets that he still needs to hold on and then falls and that means I'm following him around constantly when he's awake, and thus my free time has been cut down a bit. And as annoying as that can be sometimes, it's also so much fun to watch him romp around and stand up and learn new skills. It seems that at 9 months we've hit this great new spot where he's learning SO MUCH. The other day he was playing with a scarf and actually pulled it up over his face to play peek-a-boo with me. Now he does it anytime I give him a scarf or blanket to play with. He's showing signs of really underastanding what we're saying and the way things work, and that is just so exciting. It's been fun watching him grow and develop all along, but I think we're really starting to enter a stage that is going to be so, so fun. I'm looking forward to the discoveries soon to come. =)

What do you remember as being one of your favorite stages of your child's development?

How to Save on your Grocery Bill

Tue, 28 Oct 2008 22:19:16 GMT

A friend of mine sent me this in an email recently. She's a big Dave Ramsey follower, and she found this on one of the message boards on his website, posted by the username Kvarady. I know I won't follow all of these tips (we try to avoid processed foods for the most part, but just aren't 100% from-scratch type of cooks), and there's a few big things that didn't get a mention (meat is expensive-- you can get your protein from other, cheaper sources like beans). But all in all I'd say this is a great list of tips, for those who're looking for ways to be a bit more economical at the grocery store right now:

Everyone is looking for ways to save money. Consumable items are one of the most obvious areas of savings. I am often asked how we manage to keep our grocery budget low, and the tips below will help you find ways to slice your grocery bill by at least 20 percent.

Plan a Menu

Write the menu on the family calendar that has everything else on it. The activities listed on this calendar will trigger your thoughts on who will be available for each day's meals. It will also highlight crunch days so you can plan accordingly. Days where you are running kids around after school or work may require a slow cooker meal. The family calendar helps you recognize these days and plan accordingly. One key element for saving the 20% is to use your favorite store's sales flier when planning the menu which leads me to the next item.

Shop the Sales

If you do not get the weekly sales flier delivered, look online. I review our store's flier on the web each week. Plan your menu around the meats and produce that are on sale that week. If there is a particularly good sale item that you use often make a note to stock up on it. Over time, you get a general feel for how much of one item you might need before the next sale. Many areas repeat sales every twelve weeks. I find that certain items go on sale much more frequently. I am fairly aware of how often the sales come around for my most commonly used ingredients. In my house, this week's menu will have sale items from both last week's and this week's ads. If ground beef family packs are at a super low price, you can stock up and use it for several weeks. I generally bring the sales flier to the dinner table one night and mention the meats and produce on sale. I ask family members what sounds good to them and get other requests for the grocery list. Make your menu from the sales flier and then make your grocery list using both the menu and the sales flier.

Buy Only What You Need

I make my grocery list on business reply envelopes from junk mail inserts. It provides a place for the coupons and cash. We all know that you are supposed to make a list and stick to it. That is impossible for me but not impossible for my husband. I am the family cook so when I go through the store, I end up spending more. Sure, I might pick up an item or two that should have been on the list but reality is that I pick up a lot of things that we really do not need. So, my husband takes the list, shops only the list and comes home with whatever is on the list. I chuckle as I write this because it is important to note that he calls me at least twice during every grocery excursion. If everyone is agreeable, give this chore to the one who is most likely to spend the least.

Cook from scratch

There are those who are clueless on how to cook from scratch and know it, there are those who think they are scratch cooks, and finally, there are those who really are scratch cooks. I ask people to check their pantries and refrigerators to determine which kind of cook they are. True scratch cooks usually don't have a lot of the following:

. Boxed mixes such as pancake mix, brownie mix, cake mix, seasoned noodle mixes, seasoned rice mixes, and muffin mixes.

. Jarred items such as meat marinades, pasta sauces, cheese sauces/dips, and salad dressings.

. Packet mixes such as taco seasoning, gravy packets, and soup packets.

. Bottles of iced tea, sports drinks, chocolate milk, and sweet drinks.

. Cans of soup, enchilada sauces, chili, ready-made pasta dishes, and spaghetti sauce.

If you routinely buy a lot of the items above, that isn't scratch cooking. Scratch cooking is making nacho cheese sauce using a basic white sauce and cheese. Scratch cooking is making pancakes and muffins using flour, sugar, milk, oil and eggs. Scratch cooking means making gravy from pan drippings, taco seasoning from spices kept on hand, and iced tea by boiling tea bags in water. Scratch cooks make their own chili and a lot of their own soups. Scratch cooks use basic brown or white rice and season it accordingly. I do not wish to imply that scratch cooking is necessarily the best way to cook, but it certainly is the cheapest way to cook. Most scratch cooks have their favorite packets, boxes and jars, but for the most part, you won't find their pantry full of them.

If you realize that maybe you are not a scratch cook, there are all sorts of websites and cookbooks that can help you become one. It is very rewarding because it allows you to have more control over the quality of food you serve your family in addition to saving money. If you choose not to be a scratch cook, make note of the prepared items you buy regularly and know what the rock bottom prices are for them and try to buy them at those prices.

Clean Like Grandma Did

Cleaning supplies has gotten very fancy and very disposable. It is also very expensive. Think about how your grandmother cleaned windows. She probably used basic ingredients like ammonia, vinegar and water. She probably used old newspapers to wash her windows. Take a hard look at your cleaning supplies and see how it compares to Grandma's. Is your glass cleaner now a pack of wipes rather than an off brand bottle that requires a rag? Is your furniture cleaner now a wipe? Does your duster and toilet brush now require disposable replacements? These things are very convenient but add greatly to the grocery bill. My cleaning supplies consist of some very basic items such as ammonia, bleach, soap, and lots of rags made from old t-shirts, towels and sheets. When you wish to save money in any area, consider how grandma handled it.

Prepare for Tomorrow's Meal Tonight

This suggestion came from a frugality book I read several years ago. This alone, saves our family about $100 a month. I know from personal experience that one of the hardest things to do at the end of a busy workday is to come home and cook dinner. Regardless of our vocations, we family cooks are busy all day. Thinking ahead by one day can save your family hundreds of dollars a year by avoiding fast food and restaurant meals. When I think ahead by one day, it almost guarantees we will eat at home the next day instead of heading to a restaurant. How many times have you eaten out because you forgot to thaw the meat? When cooking and cleaning up dinner tonight, take some steps to prepare tomorrow night's meal. Check the menu, verify you have the ingredients, gather the ingredients and place them front and center on the counter or on a shelf, and pull out the meat to thaw. If you are going to use the slow cooker, put all the ingredients in the crock and place it in the fridge. If you need another family member to start the process before you get home tomorrow night, put up the reminder sticky note tonight. If you need to marinate meat, whip up the marinade tonight and put a note on the garage door or fridge to remind yourself to pour the marinade over the meat in the morning. Also take the time to pack tomorrow's lunches for those who need one. My husband and teens clean up so I am free to work on these other things while they are busy. A nice benefit is that we are all in the kitchen after dinner still spending family time together. This simple change in habit of starting the process the night before saves us a minimum of $40 a week because it stops us from eating out.

Put Smorgasbord Night on the Menu

This represents one of those things I thought everyone did and was surprised to learn otherwise. Smorgasbord night is our term for using leftovers. It is best understood if I describe a typical night. The night before grocery shopping day, I will do smorgasbord night. What I do is inventory everything we have not eaten during the week. I make a special effort to use anything that has a short life span. I generally display all the smorgasbord items on a big white platter or large cutting board for appeal. Here is how it works. One or two leftover pieces of pizza get cut into bite-sized pieces, heated, and placed on the platter. Remaining fruit gets cut into wedges or bite sized pieces and added to the platter. Enough deli turkey for one sandwich will get made into a sandwich, cut into wedges, and added to the platter. Raw vegetables are added. Sometimes I have some ingredients I can pull together from leftovers to make a wrap or a quesadilla. I will pull those together, cut them into smaller portions and add them to the platter. I use party toothpicks on some items like wraps to keep them together or on chunks of pineapple or other fruit for easy handling. Even an extra piece of lasagna or an extra burrito will get warmed and cut into smaller portions. Each family member gets a variety of food and walks away from the table feeling satisfied. I get the satisfaction of a cleaned out fridge and the good feeling of making sure we use up the food before bringing in more food.

Make Do with What You Have

I initiated a $25 a week grocery challenge to some members last year. The goal for each family who took the challenge was to commit to cutting their grocery bill to $25 a week to buy bread, milk and perishables so we could use up what we had. The challenge forced us to make our own chicken broth, it forced us to use up some unusual grains we bought for special recipes, it forced us to get very creative with our cooking and to try new things. About a dozen took the challenge and the reality was that several of us felt like our food was multiplying. I found a mystery grain in my cupboard and after figuring out what it was (bulgur), cooked it like rice and now we know my family likes it better than rice. I started making chicken broth from scratch again by throwing the bones into a crock full of water with celery ends, onion ends, a clove of garlic and some pepper. I let it cook all night, turn it off in the morning and allow it to cool. Strain it and place the broth in container to freeze. Several of us made it 7 weeks spending 75% less than what we would normally spend.

Save Bits and Pieces

I keep two containers in my freezer, one for beef based items and one for chicken based items. A small portion of beef roast left, it gets cut into soup or stew sized pieces and goes into the container. Six green beans left, they go into a container. A little dab of onion goes into the container. A small bit of gravy goes into the container. When the container is a little over half full, I make soup with it. Did you know that leftover mashed potatoes make terrific potatoes soup the next night?

Take a Trash Inventory

Analyze your trash and see if what you are throwing away tells you something. Are you throwing away Ziploc bags instead of rewashing and reusing? Are you throwing out beef or chicken bones before using them to make broth? Are there a lot of paper towels going into the trash instead of using dishrags and cloth towels? When you throw away an old t-shirt, do you cut it up into rags and only throw away the unusable parts. Are you throwing away the heels of bread instead of saving them up and making homemade croutons, using them for French onion soup, or your own Italian bread crumb mix? I dust my house with old gym socks. I put them on both hands and go through with my spray and do double handed dusting. There is a lot of money in that trash can if you look at it with the right thought process.

The Art of Leftovers

I don't know if everyone's family is like mine but no one in my house (except me) will actually open the lid of a plastic container to see what is inside it. That is where most of my food waste use to occur. These days, if I have enough roast beef and mashed potatoes left over for someone to have for lunch, I arrange it on a plate. I will put the gravy in a small glass bowl on the same plate. Then I will wrap the plate up with plastic wrap and set it on a shelf in the fridge. If I do this, DH will actually grab the plate and heat it up for lunch. I will often make a platter of fruits and veggies and do the same thing. I find that if I make the food look appealing and set it where it can be seen, it will actually get eaten and I have less waste. When the kids were younger, I would pull the platter of fruits and veggies out of the fridge right after school. I would add crackers and pb or cheese and maybe a couple of cookies. Since they were always starving after school, it was a great time to get them to eat some fruits and veggies. After school, I think they would have eaten cardboard if I arranged it artfully enough.

Learn to Pull a Meal Out of Thin Air

You look in the fridge and there doesn't seem to be much there. This is where creativity kicks in. I can usually pull together a fried rice dish or a quesadilla with just about anything. A little chicken or beef can easily turn into chicken or beef fried rice. Chopped carrots, chopped onion, chopped celery, a florret to broccoli chopped, one egg and the little bit of meat, an egg and some soy sauce can easily become an entree. Some tomato paste, dried herbs, chopped garlic and onion can become pizza sauce. Flour, water, sugar and yeast can become pizza crust. Greens such as fresh basil or some spinach and some cheese can become the toppings. Cheese, spinach, peppers, and onions and a little leftover chicken often become quesadillas for us. Cream cheese mixed with herbs and garlic can be spread on bagels or crackers served along with the remaining fruits or veggies to become a lighter meal. Think about some of the appetizers you see on restaurant menus and try to duplicate them as a lighter meal.

Learn to Say NO to Overconsumption

My brother was complaining a couple weeks ago that his family goes through 4 gallons of milk a week. I just looked at him and said, "So stop it and don't buy 4 gallons. Only buy 2 and see if they still survive. I guarantee they will." He said he never says NO to milk. I disagree wholeheartedly. Just because they will consume it doesn't mean you are obligated to provide it to the saturation point. The nutritional needs AND the family budget need to be balanced. In our house, if we are out of milk, that means we are out of milk until shopping day. It taught our kids to ration things out a bit and to not be gluttonous about consuming all they wanted. If your kids can holler, "Mom, we are out of milk," and you replace it within 24 hours, you might consider evaluating consumption habits. Allowing family members to think they can consume from a limitless well is both expensive and leads to bad eating habits.

The point of this post is to think a few years back and consider how your grandmother would manage her household. As you get ready to pull an item off the shelf, ask yourself if your grandmother would have bought that item. If not, what would she have used instead? Bets are it is a lot cheaper than what you are about to buy.

Need to Vent?

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 14:24:57 GMT

Recently Momaroo posted about mothers who regret having children, and whether some people might not have this "maternal gene."

I'm one of those people that expected to love motherhood from the start. I've had loads of experience with kids of all ages and have always loved being around children. It surprised me that I didn't bond with my son right away (it took a few months) and that motherhood has been as difficult as it has been these past almost-nine months. Quite frankly, motherhood has kicked my ass. I wouldn't go as far as to say that I regret having my son, because I love him dearly, but there are days when I wish I could go back to being childfree just for a day, or when I see someone walking down the street who doesn't have children and think about how nice it might be to have that kind of freedom again.

I think we're often led to believe that motherhood is such a natural thing, that maternal instinct and bonding will just magically appear, and we don't do a good enough job of preparing ourselves and each other for how big a challenge it all really is. This is changing a bit these days, but it's still taboo for a mom to admit that she's having a hard time dealing with her kids and we're all expected to love motherhood and our children 100%, 100% of the time. Which is just plain not realistic.

So let's create a safe place here for venting. You can leave an anonymous comment so no one knows who you are.

POLL: Sleep

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 13:59:04 GMT

It's kind of amazing to me how there seems to be this huge difference between what all the "experts" say about infant sleep (baby should be sleeping through the night after the first few months, otherwise the parents are doing something wrong!!), and the real-life stories I hear from parents all around me (that many, many kids don't STTN till they're between 1-2 years old).

D has been waking about once every 2-3 hours for the entire past month. He's always woken up at least 1-2 times a night, but this past month it's been pretty bad. I kept thinking, "He's almost 9 months old, shouldn't he be sleeping better than this??" but then I have friends who tell me about their kids, or their friends' kids, who are the same age or older and doing the same thing.

So I'm curious, and am hoping you Momaroos out there will help me out. Leave a comment telling us at what age your children started sleeping through the night somewhat consistently (I'll define "sleeping through the night" as one full 8 hour stretch for the purpose of this poll). I'd like to see what the numbers are. Thanks! =)

Never go to bed angry?

Tue, 14 Oct 2008 15:23:30 GMT

I was thinking about this piece of advice the other day. I'm sure we've all been told it at one time or another-- to never go to bed angry at your spouse/significant other. It's probably one of the most common words of advice out there. The reasoning is (I assume) to always end the day happy with each other, rather than spoil those goodnight kisses with anger or resentment.

This must be great advice, otherwise it wouldn't keep getting passed on. But I have to think it's not always the case or appropriate. Do disputes, even small ones, always have to be resolved by a specified timeline? Isn't it sometimes worse to try to keep badgering at something when you're cranky, frustrated, and just plain don't want to deal with it?

There's been many times in our marriage when at the end of a long day hubby or I will get annoyed with each other, and may even bicker some. In truth the real problem isn't with each other or even something the other did, but with the fact that we're tired and need to go to sleep. So many times nights like these are followed by mornings where any frustration or annoyance has been forgotten, and I'll realize that what I got so annoyed about last night is not worth it. Other times we've started arguing about something and one of us will call a time-out because we're getting too fired up. We'll each spend 20-30 minutes doing our own thing in separate rooms, and 9 times out of 10 when we come back together we're able to easily and calmly figure out a solution to whatever we were arguing about because after cooling off we're each more rational and understanding and able to see more clearly.

Every couple works a bit differently, and what works great for one won't work at all for another, you just have to figure out your own rhythm. Do you and your husband always resolve things in the moment, or do you take time to think things over and let issues simmer? Do you try to "never go to bed angry?"

What No One Tells The Mom

Thu, 09 Oct 2008 22:58:55 GMT

Years ago when hubby and I were engaged, I found a book by Marg Stark called What No One Tells The Bride. It's a fabulous book that truly looks into preparing to be married rather than just thinking about the wedding day. I have since bought copies for several friends when they, too, got engaged.

Then this morning D and I were strolling the public library when I found another book by the same author, this one titled What No One Tells the Mom. The back cover describes it as a book about how to survive the first years of parenting with your sanity intact. I checked out the copy, and luckily D took an extra long afternoon nap so I was able to read the first few chapters. Already, I really like this book. I have not been shy about how difficult motherhood has been for me, something that was a bit of a surprise as I consider myself to be a baby person and have had lots of experience caring for them before. But nothing prepares you for being a mother yourself, the energy it takes, the lack of sleep... and not to mention the guilt and fighting off all those expectations that we put on ourselves to be The Perfect Mother. That's what this book is about-- realizing that while there are many women out there who revel in motherhood and always love their kids, there's many more of us that are tired, overwhelmed, and at times even feel resentful of our babies that we love so dearly, or of the loss of our former selves and previous lifestyle. It talks about how to adjust your expectations, surround yourself with friends who'll be honest with you and with whom you can be honest so you can vent in a safe place and get that support that we all need and deserve. I'm curious and excited to see what the rest of the book will bring, but already I feel that this is a book I could recommend to friends getting ready to be moms.

Have you read this book? What did you think of it? Do you have other books that you'd recommend to help cope with the difficulties of parenting?

Too Young for Swim Lessons?

Thu, 09 Oct 2008 15:57:00 GMT

D has recently discovered a love of water. He LOVES water. Tries to get his hands in the cat's water dish constantly, spends his entire bath time soaking himself and me by splashing everywhere, etc. So I've started wondering about baby swim lessons for him. I don't know if this is something he might outgrow for some reason, but I like the idea of "catching" him in this time period when he's so interested in water. I've been told by some friends that this age (8 months) is a perfect time to get babies used to water and teach them a few basic skills like holding their breath if they go under. It would be nice to have him know what to do in water, although of course I would never leave him unattended and would still take every precaution against drowning.

Have any of you enrolled your baby in a swim class? At what age? How did you find out information about local classes?

Dad "scared" of feeding time

Wed, 08 Oct 2008 16:47:30 GMT

As a mom, and especially as a stay-at-home mom, I think I tend to get into the habit of assuming responsibility for things that have to do with D. It's something we all probably do, in all sorts of areas of life. For example my husband is a much better cook than I am, so even before we had any kids it would often be assumed that he'd cook dinner unless he asked me to. These days I find that we both tend to assume I'll take care of the things like feeding D or getting him ready for bed at night. It even goes as far as me having a shorter tolerance for fussing, and so if all of us are home and D starts fussing while playing on the floor I tend to be the one to pick him up as hubby takes a bit longer to respond. (I don't want to make him seem like a bad dad-- he's an incredible father, and very involved. But he and I just deal with certain situations differently).

Lately we've both been trying to fight these assumptions. There's more nights where I'll cook dinner while hubby gives D his bath and gets him into bed. However there's one thing that I tend to do 99% of the time, because hubby actively avoids it-- feeding D solid foods. Hubby has done this a handful of times, and it's turned out quite messy and sometimes D doesn't eat much, or anything at all. This has made hubby gun-shy and afraid of feeding D. Lately I've tried getting him to do a feeding, and he'll try a few bites, then declare that D's not eating anything and hand me the bowl and spoon (nevermind that half the time D doesn't take anything from me, either, but that's another post...).

I know he means well, and he himself admits that he needs to get over this fear he has. I think I'll need to just put him in charge of a feeding a few times and leave the room so that he HAS to do it on his own and can't pass it off to me. I actually think this is something I should do more often in general, just leaving the 2 of them together for an hour or two, so that hubby gets more comfortable and confident with his ability to take care of D on his own. I think it's tough for him that I deal with D so much and so know him and his habits so much more, and hubby just doesn't spend as much time with him (because of working full-time) and so doesn't feel that same comfort.

Have any of you had trouble with getting your husband to be more involved with the kids and their caretaking? Do you have any tips for dealing with this?

Oompa Toys

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 07:40:00 GMT

I recently discovered a new toy shopping website, and I may be in trouble. I've been trying to find good sites for safe, wooden baby toys. Well, then today I came across Oompa Toys and I think I've hit the jackpot. They have a TON of toys listed, including many from top brands like Haba and Plan Toys, along with all sorts of othetr things like books, games, etc. And if you're worried about your toys coming from China and thus being laced with poison, here you can search for toys based on where they are made-- you can select to browse through toys made in the USA or in one of many European countries, and then further filter the toys by categories like suggested age range, brand, or price.

I foresee spending lots of time (and money) shopping here, both for D and for gifts for friends and family.

What's your diaper bag?

Mon, 06 Oct 2008 15:46:54 GMT

The past 8 months I've been using a Skip Hop Dash bag as my diaper bag. It's worked pretty well-- I love all the pockets, and that I can wear it messenger-style. But lately I've been wondering about getting another bag. Part of me wants to go with a bag that's bigger, so I can hold more things. Then I realize that if it's bigger, then I will carry more stuff... and my bag will get even heavier than it already is. Then I wonder about just using my Patemm pad to hold diapers and wipes and keeping that in D's stroller, and using a large purse to hold my things and a few toys and change of clothes for D. Hmmm... so many options.

What do you use as a diaper bag? How many diaper bags do you own?